My Life Would Suck...

I heard Kelly Clarkson’s newest song.  I vented my frustrations to Kate.  I heard it a few more times.  Katie shared with me that Alice had a similar response.  I saw Kelly Clarkson perform the song on Saturday Night Live belting out about how  “Either way, I found out I am nothing without you.”  No one (except Alice) is appalled.

I sat at dinner with my sister, brother, and sister-in-law and thought that I had a captive audience when I shared these sentiments.  I really didn’t go too big.  I think I said something to the effect of how shitty it was for Kelly Clarkson to release a song teaching young women that their lives suck without men.  Apparently their read was that the song is about love and the value in finding loving relationships..... hm... not my read.

Pretty regularly I find myself throwing my hands in air with frustration over the lack of imagery that supports a strong and independent female identity.   I am offended by the TV, radio, my co-workers, and my peers so I am not sure why this one Kelly Clarkson song has offended me so strongly.   One reason may be that I saw Kelly Clarkson as a beacon amid pop music crap—creating music around topics like not accepting bullshit from men and celebrating your own identity without a man attached.  I think I am mostly offended because I identified with Kelly Clarkson.  As silly as it sounds (and is) I felt that she sang about shit I could relate to and I felt good about playing for my sister's girls.  

There are so few femininities that are celebrated or promoted to young women.  All of these female identities are attached to having a male partner.  Virtuous and well-behaved--mom/wife.  Sexy and promiscuous--girlfriend.  Every song on the radio is about heteronormative relationships, every show, every movie, every image used in dittos created by Houghton Mifflin and public education curriculum.  Fine, maybe I am exaggerating but now that Kelly Clarkson has sold out, I've given up all hope.  Where do you find imagery supporting strong female identities that aren't attached to a man?  Not in the mainstream media that most young women consume, that is for sure....

I am the problem, right—I consume it.  I consume all of the mainstream crap that is just more of the same.  I suppose the first step is to make a personal choice against consuming shit that supports patriarchy.

With all of the advances women have made professionally, politically, personally, there is still so little space for women to find fulfillment without men. "You got a piece of me and honestly, my life would suck without you"  From the youngest age I remember believing this about my own life and having it affirmed just about everywhere.  At 24 years old, I am barely beginning to figure out self fulfillment and happiness that isn't attached to a man. I suppose this is why I am so offended.  

Anyone else outraged?  Thoughts? ? ? ? ? ?